Monday, April 23, 2012

Fear and Anxiety

You would think after 23 years of storm chasing, I would know one truth: I do not control the weather. But if I knew that truth, I would probably not suffer so much anxiety in letting it be what it is. I need to learn to live each day, try my hardest to understand the patterns, but after all the work I can do, I must let it go.

You would think I would let myself off the hook because I know I cannot control the weather. You would think I would admire and appreciate what it is and just go with it. No. Like the fool I often am, I try to muscle tornadoes out of skies without clouds. And then get mad and depressed because it did not turn out like I wanted to.

If this sounds insane, welcome to my world. I try to muscle great things out of situations where I have no control. In people or situations or anything. As far as I know, only God has control. So I offer up my prayer to Him. But it is not for storms or friendships or anything else. I pray for sanity. I pray for peace. That in all situations I trust in Him.

Of course, I would like a few less storms in my life and a few more on my trip.

Paul

1 comment:

Irish Paul said...

One think I have learned from stormchasing is that it is not about how many tornadoes you get but how much you learn, This year I have a few good days and a few busts already, one not too long ago where I drove out west under overcast skies which held on way too long, clearing out around 6 and convection as hard as it tried didnt have enough Energy available to handle the amazing shear, ever one was spinning as it they tried though, I still went home smiling as I learned so much from that day. Maybe you need to approach chasing more from the students point of view where everything is learning, less emphasis on Tornados and more on the processes of what is happening, we learn little from big outbreaks they can be awesome but often times frustrating too, Like in life we have to the ability to learn a lot more by our mistakes and unlucky days than we do our good days. And another thing im sure you will agree with if mistakes get made its because we are not looking at the big picture and being patient, stress clouds our judgement (like me in your exams lol) calmness and focus reaps the greatest rewards. Remember as students we are happy to be out there learning everything we can, Tornados are a bonus. take time to look at storm structure, take lightning shots and appreciate the storms as a whole, God knows most Most tornados we get are rain wrapped or at dusk with poor lighting. Don't stress the things you cant control!, and go with your initial gut instinct, I find the biggest result of poor days for me is changing my mind in a chase to find out my initial forecast was right all along . And best of Luck this year !